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1/6/09 03:52 pm

I started petty drama at work in finding out that someone has the hots for me and Samm........ yet I'm not dreading going for some reason. I just finished my essay and got my magazine finally. I feel like things are kind of going my way for right now, at least for today.

1/5/09 04:03 pm

If there was ever a day to be emotionally kicked in the balls - today was it, I'd say. I swallowed my pride and signed up for the LPN entrance test to hold me a spot in the nursing program at CVCC. It was awful, I wanted to cry. The climax of all of this was when the lady from Remington asked me what I was doing after graduation, in which I confidently replied, "Transfer to a four year school for English." And when she asked what I was going to do with it, I said, "Well, I don't know." I'm such an idiot. A year ago, I thought I had a wonderful plan to eat cheap food on a cheap couch and just rock out all day all night; which is still, I have to admit, an amazing plan - but I just like buying underwear too much and I tend to have a lot of doctors visits and contrary to my belief I might actually live past 33...................................

12/22/08 09:44 pm

Theres an old saying that if you dream about someone in your family dying, then someone you know will have a baby. My mom and I each had one within the past two weeks, maybe I'm just being superstitous but I'm pretty creeped out.

A little excited for Christmas - pretty sure I know what I'm getting.

12/21/08 10:02 am

This is getting old

12/16/08 04:11 pm


She's got the warmest body that I've ever had
Drag the lake, you'll find it full of love

12/12/08 04:10 pm


In class, we watched a video on relationship studies, and how most people date other people with the same eye color, hair color, skin tone, etc. If you look at a timeline of someone's ex lovers, you will see a pattern. They pick the same stuff. Most people. Upon hearing this, I laughed one giant gasp of air so hard that my throat locked, sending a narrow spray of Tropicana across my desk and books. In the darkness, I felt my classmates' eyes drift over to me. I held my breath. Everyone settled back on the movie. Then I started to cry.

12/11/08 03:21 pm

Some faggot at my school tried to do a rendition of Gossip Girl via myspace, posting blogs about people getting engaged and my friends being pregnant. And they had the audacity to request me.

I feel disgustingly boring lately as if I all I do is lay around and rub my belly and watch bad T.V. shows because, well, that's all I've been doing. To kick back into it, tonight my sister and I will attempt an all nighter. And sometime this weekend, the glow party and a hotel sneak in must take place.

I also have a mini-interview at a pharmacy tomorrow which I am pretty excited about.

12/9/08 06:45 pm

I don't know who I think I am snooping around all the time. This is a disaster. aka, someone who used to be a strange mystery has suddenly transformed to the girl who works in a flower shop and is pretty skinny and lets guys go down on her all the time.........

I want us to go to the hotel tonight. I devulged many a details today that I had never devulged to anyone. Big details. I doubt that you are reading this but if you perhaps are I want to thank you six million times for listening and to tell you how hard it was for me not to sob like a bitch in the car. And I wish I invited you over for dinner, lol.

12/8/08 04:12 pm

Getting too ahead of myself here, but Joe and I were talking today of getting the old group together for one last hoorah. I know that a lot of people are bullshitting and don't really want to go through with it, but I'm getting this gut feeling that I should just say fuck it and invite everyone over my house one night during break. Really, what's the worst that could happen?... lollll.

I also don't want to go to work. It's too cold to move right now but I'm doing it mainly for the ride there/home. Despite my car being on it's deathbed and the yucky weather, I've been loving every chance I get to drive by myself and rock out. And oh mah gahhhhhddddddd I just updated my zune and for some reason I have games on here, which is really cool, and I can play solataire at work.


12/1/08 06:18 pm

I suppose my van and I were one person in another lifetime. I have to take it in tonight and have no vehicle tomorrow, while my mother makes me drink this disgusting medicine that mixes in my water and smells like glue. I also just wrote an essay for a Lycoming application, still wondering why because 1) I know I won't get in and 2) even if I do get in, I know that I won't go. Why do I get myself into these things.

Everyone has been nice and loving for the past two days, I miss everyone, and it didn't help that Ashley went missing for a few days and I cried on the way home from clinicals while Caitie stared and I was relieved when she picked up the phone. I'm laughing at myself while writing this, thinking of when they called me the mother of my friends. I have to fill the void of babies somehow,

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